The most sensual part of physique is brain; yet sensual pleasures are felt through the
body.
The word sex connotes very strange, strong and acidic reactions among Indian people and
they are unable to discuss it and most even deny it. Let us find out why this un-natural
reaction and rather uncomfortable and nerve stirring occur!
Why..?
It is the conditioning, upbringing and a major historical blockage for lack of adequate
education and formal or informal training in this vital field.
Pre-Islamic India was a world - where sensual and bodily pleasures were even experimented
to heighten and reach higher levels of the sub-consciouns mind and were considered almost
spiritual - as spirit, material and physique blended with such a sophistication and
refined to such esoteric levels, that an extraordinary wonderful state of mind flourished
in the course of many centuries of so called golden period of India when Indian
civilizations reached to the zenith of highest refinement in the matters of spirit and
mind.
Physique as we said is a slave of our mind and spirit. The freer the mind and spirit the
freer our body becomes.
\ More natural, closer to nature and closer to the supreme
reality.
Modern Indian concept of Sex
The modern Indian concept of sex is considered a hidden, occult phenomenon and something
to be ashamed of and never to be talked in public. The Western Judeo-Christian societies
meanwhile have attempted to free themselves by open discussion of such subjects in last
few decades thus making it an issue as almost part of formal education. This has also
helped them to clear many doubts, find answers, resolving many marital issues, and
creating an awareness for sexually transmitted diseases.
The anatomical geography of body is considered as important as geo-economy of the world.
Very popular authors' talk to compare zero sea level to the sexual satisfaction level. An
extra cold person (ei below sea level desires is considered a medically or clinically
unfit person and scientific analysis of such behaviour has resulted in curing such people
and thus enhancing the quality of lives for millions of people).
I agree that many things should remain rather in shadow yet there must be some dialogue to
manifest the curiosities, worries, doubts and problems faced by un-initiated or rather
untrained people in this area.
Indian people and culture; in its present form, only tries to hide the obvious and the
natural and there is hardly a place where a young person can go to consult.
Go to India and you will see walls plastered with bill board sized advertisements from sex
doctors who usually are untrained, self appointed sex guides and usually attract people
who don't read books (I suppose). The literature available is outdated, useless, confusing
and absolutely meaningless.
Even the so-called professionals are lost in Ramayana period and talk with conditioning
and in a hyper programmed language which barely describes the reality. We are so
hypocrates in this issue that we consider it irreligious when this has nothing to do with
any religion. A health and medical training or education is considered a priority, but
only for disease management. India still lags behind in psychiatric studies, mental
disorders and that’s why so many people go un-treated with severe psych. Disorders.
We reject many things for unknown fears! I may be generalizing here but you know what I am
trying to say. We are talking about the ATTITUDES here.
Sex and pornography?
For reasons better known to the older generations, India - prohibits the publication of
pornography (which is commendable) but in the zeal to keep pornography in check, the
system also bulldozes the really essential and educational information too. This is
another thing that many a clever and unprepared people have in last many years used
educational publications as a cover but they are distributing crude and unsophisticated
pornography in the name of discussion and education.
In the search engine for India at Search India at
Hindustan.net we get a log book of about 25.000 searches daily and many searches have
sex related queries.
Unfortunately most internet sex related sites offer nothing but a bunch of pornographic
pictures and that even for a price. Most people who are unable to get a date, or are
frustrated enough to not go out and find one or others who simply believe that they may
get some excitement by such voyeurism. What you can get for a couple of dollars printed
magazines, you pay exorbitant fees to view online. In the USA, most such people are either
teenagers or older people who use these sites for curiosity and anyone with a sense of
reality shun this kind of time waste.
Coming back to India and Indian people's attitude towards sex, the first available thing
to almost any Indian person is Film music and our grotesque movies - which exploit this
matter rather sadistically.
Indian film makers are a rare breed of people who are convinced that people will be
greatly excited by seeing a well endowed woman, a man without shirt, or with breasts
padded with wonder bras and cotton, in wet clothes, under the artificial rain or on the
beach, and about dozen disgusting and absolutely cheap musical gyrations which they
denominate as dances!
The lyrics from these movies are used to communicate the imposed censor on sexual
expression and to arouse sensual mysteries.
Most of the Hindi Urdu songs specially written for the movies in India and Pakistan in
last decade or so are nothing but pornography lyricized by seductive vocabulary.
This causes more damage than good and this kind of ignorance and hypocracy is nothing but
an unknown fear in Indian mind.
The fears of sex go to hilarious and scary levels. This is actually causing lot of
distress, ignorance and social upheaval in very subtle ways and we need to overcome this
stupid notion that discussing sex is unhealthy and unholy.
We need to discuss publicly and create an awareness among people that an intelligent
education on all levels is desirable and this way we can create a much healthier society
in future.
The Indian sexuality remains a taboo and an issue which remain as mysterious as the
metaphysical subjects in western societies.
Are Indians different than others?
No..All Human beings with balanced mind and physique have similar needs and instincts.
It is proven by great number of research results that people living in hotter and sunny
climates have more sexual activity than the ones in colder area. Say a couple in a
Caribbean island or tropics will have more frequent sexual activity than one in
Scandinavia or North Europe. Even in European continent one can see the difference of
behaviour in Cold Central North with gloomy winters and shiny lands of Mediterranean
Europe.
Why and how Indian Sensuality became rather complex
While living in Europe, I gave many courses on introduction to Indian mysticism, occult,
Tantra and basics of Indian philosophy in mid 80s, and MOST queries from participants were
that WHY Indian people supposedly so advanced that it gave ways of lives like Tantra,
Treatises like Kamasutra and literature like Abhigyan Shakuntalam of Kalidasa,
sophisticated erotic poetry
of 7th and 8th centuries - that same people can have no idea about sexuality or rather
have distorted views in modern India.
Indian sensuality gradually became shadowed and rather a complexity, among other reasons,
when in 10th century onwards the Muslim invaders started coming to Indian cities and
started their plunder, forced their will on an already extremely developed civilization.
These barbaric invasions also included brutal raping and indiscriminate abduction of
children and women as the hordes who came from Turkey, Arabia and Central Asia were mainly
men and rather illiterate rough soldiers who sadly considered themselves crusadors. (They
were unlike the European crusadors of middle ages)
Indian society was forced to use veil and had to hide the women and children from these
monsters.
Since then and for almost a thousand years till 1950s; Indian people have had to live
under constant fear and under pressures as we never had a free will nor we were a free and
open society by any means.
Muslim plunderers and conquerors succeeded by dividing Indian kingdoms, made them fought
among themselves, sheer violence and indiscriminate use of brute force fueled by religious
zeal that in making an "infidel" a Muslim will guarantee a place for himself in
heaven? (sounds familiar?)
With this absurd and ignorant zeal; the hordes infiltrated Indian borders just like they
did in Egypt, Near East Mediterranean, Africa, Maghreb, Spain, Central Asia and Iran.
Wherever this phenomena happened the social, economic and sexual lives of these people
changed drastically.
Picture yourself that imagine you live in a suburb of some American metropolis and over
the period of a decade a overzealous foreign language speaking people with superior arms;
invade your city and country and start looting and raping the first person they meet. What
will you do? You will defend yourself by getting stabbed, hurt and or defend your family
by putting them in some hidden corner. Obviously we are talking a period about 1000 years
ago when people didn’t have enough defense and private people had only a knife to cut
vegetables.
This is a very important historical fact and this is as real as life, consequently this
scar changed the lives of those affected for ever.
Muslims were driven out by Spanish people in 1492 by collective force under the queen
Isabela who, after 700 years of constant struggle, forced the Moors to simply leave on
their own and the rest were fought and thrown out. Since then in last 500 years Spain has
changed a lot and became a modern state yet when you visit the Southern part - Andalucia -
you see the dress and manner is less European and much more conservative than any average
European community.
Yet go across the Algeciras port and after 18 miles you enter into Morocco at the tip of
Africa and you see hidden women, and a rather primitive life style similar to which Spain
had witnessed from 711 to 1492.
Many of my academic friends in Spain conducted various research studies on these issues
and my regular interaction with all these people saw the subtle differences and the impact
of Arab culture. However I must point out that the Arabs in Spain were definitely more
sophisticated and educated lot and unlike Invaders in India and Iran, they were mainly
from Civilized Arabia of Baghdad and Damascus of 8th century which were known for their
highest culture and education just like the Greeks. A great and lovely blend of
Judeo-christian-islamic culture flourished in Andalucia which was unique in all history of
mankind. Despite all this, the sexual attitudes and the behaviour in Southern Spain was
and is still very different than for example the rest of Spain.
Is our attitude towards sex changed?
The India of last 50 years, have seen great changes and from a virtual zero we started and
almost everybody was resourceless and poor. But sheer hard work, despite our dillydallying
half socialistic and fake communistic approach of congress party; we have survived the
onslaughts and bullshit of a Victorian morality which is nothing but a fantastic fraud and
total hypocrisy in the name of a progress based on North Korean style self-reliance
ideology.
India had to live within its borders and we had to breathe and survive.
Times and Things change anyway, and global oriented economy has started throwing some
lights on the dark corners like India in a way which we never imagined a decade before.
India - has catapulted from a sleepy old wounded civilization mass into a awakened giant
and with this great economic and social awakening - will awake our deepened, dormant and
occult sensuality.
The future of Indian sensuality?
The famous Indian sensuality, quoted incessantly in the world, by mentions of Tantric life
styles, Kamasutras and erotic arts - - will change the face of the world - again - in
coming decades when Indian people find themselves again.
This futuristic optimistic view I have after witnessing, in last 2 decades, a cross
section of Indian people who are adjusted in the less dogmatic and prosperous Western
societies and their behaviour patterns and views - reflect that a healthier sexual
approach to our lives is - eventually - healthier for our well being, our over all
progress and of course a new awakening on personal level.
The newer generations of India and Indian people worldwide have been trying to define the
sexual and sensual vocabulary on their own; rather influenced by external and foreign
influences.
In fact, it is a healthier approach and eventually when Indian people in India in 1 or 2
decades - when they become all formally educated and emancipated socially, and have rather
more space and time at their discretion; will find that an open dialogue about sex matters
is normal and acceptable.
We should start talking about issues and focus light on dark areas which create ignorance,
ill health and many social evils like failed marriages, rapes, divorces, disrespect to
women, abuse of children and in general an unhappy people.
Should we talk?
Why should we not talk about this when it is such an important issue and affect one
thousand million people, almost 20% of the whole population of the world?
So using this anonymous forum and frequented by the most intelligent and
crème-de-la-crème of Indian people worldwide we invite you to participate in this never
or hardly discussed area and you may be surprised that talking about the prohibited can be
rather soothing as you are not breaking any religious codes nor you are being uncivilized.
It is perfectly normal and healthy.
If you find this unhealthy and uncivilized, probably you are still living in some dark
wonderland and you should go back to some good library and read some texts on human
evolution. We say good luck to such people and welcome to those who believe in inquiry,
finding the facts, knowing their ownselves, and the healthy discussion on a topic which
involves our general well being not only as individuals but also as a collective.
So let us start and talk about the untalked and undiscussed
Most respectfully yours
Pk Kapila
There is an important discusson going on for last one year on issues related to
marriage, matrimonial life, affairs, love or arranged marriages etc. You are most welcome
to participate:
